Sa-Dish-Tic!

– Forbidden Foods, and Matching Wines

by Michael Parker

In a recent guest opinion printed in the Mountain Xpress, a local animal lover bemoans the local chefs who offer foie gras. He repeats the allegations of the cruelty behind its production and the resulting environmental devastation, and finishes with “Please join me in boycotting local restaurants that serve foie gras and urging City Council members to approve a citywide ban of this so-called delicacy.”

Boycotting local restaurants. Nice. Getting local government involved. Brilliant. After punishing the restaurants’ employees, let’s create government jobs for the enforcers of the ban and go write them sah-tations! Let’s also ignore that this is a particularly small “problem” in the global food and restaurant industry.

Of course there are abuses out there, and concerned civilized people are a good, ever-growing force for positive and beneficial changes. Still, foie gras should be the would-be local cause célèbre? For this we want to intimidate local restaurants and affect the incomes earned therein?

This takes me back to, I think, 2006. Local activists, a husband and wife team, were mightily picketing and protesting foie gras right in front of one of downtown’s best. Holding high large gruesome photos of geese and ducks being force-fed, they stood in front of the restaurant’s plate glass windows, hovering over the front tables where loyal customers had to look the other way – not for guilt, foie gras was not on that particular restaurant’s menu that day.

I confronted this couple and spoke on behalf of the customers seated by the front window. The lead protester replied, “They can sit in the back.”

They eventually went on to demonstrate against the sale of regionally produced turkey at the food co-op, and were also known for decrying the use of doves at a public event honoring Mahatma Gandhi.

I must express some gratitude, were it not for this recent call for a pro-canard posse comitatus, I would struggle to find inspiration for this month’s column about food and wine. Let’s match it up!

Foie Gras – It’s hard to go wrong for a match with the gorgeous texture and luxurious flavor of the liver of a goose fattened via gavage. Simply keep in mind the preparation. The traditional match is Sauternes, so there exist countless late-harvest white wines as alternatives. Sweet white is best when the preparation includes fruit. Infused or blended with black truffle and simply seared, the way I like it, opens the door for reds ranging from Cabernet Sauvignon to fuller-bodied red Rhone blends.

Ikizukuri – Translation: “prepared alive,” and served that way, wigglin’ like Jell-o from a mold. It’s a fish (sometimes a cephalopod or crustacean), so of course just about any white wine will do. Since you have to fly to Japan for it, consider a local fruit-infused sake. Always support local when you can.

Ortalan Bunting – Known for a combination of flavors, the result of blinding the bird to trick it into feeding around the clock, the resulting fat, the drowning of the bird in Armagnac, roasting, and then eating whole while hiding from God under a napkin, a correct match here is important. The bones still crunch, and offer up a hazelnut-like flavor, add fig, brandy, the salty taste of your own blood (Eating the bones, remember? Don’t worry, it’s just a little prick.) The rest of the flavor will make you think a gamey version of foie gras. Bold red. I’m thinking Nebbiolo.

Shark fin soup – This simple recipe of chicken stock, scallions, spices, and fin boiled until tender. However, pairing wines with soups is often tricky. In this case, I would go for a California or New Zealand Pinot Noir, or perhaps a Chenin Blanc. The impression of sweetness would enhance the taste of the meat.

Horse – Best described as a taste between beef and venison, there is a sweet note to it. I say pair it with old vine Zinfandel or red Rhone blends. Served raw, as they do in Parma, Italy, a horse tartar called pesto di cavallo, the recommended wine is Barbera or estate-bottled Beaujolais.

Wild Beluga caviar – The visual leads even the novice to the obvious match: Champagne. Bubbles love bubbles, but that is not the only reason for the pairing. Sparkling wine goes with salt, spices, and practically all textures. If the caviar is being served as a garnish, then the food it is set to enhance will have to determine the wine.

Girl Scout Cookies – It’s the palm oil we have to deal with here, that is until the Girl Scouts put on their big-girl britches and choose to abandon this rainforest-depleting ingredient. Across the selection, and especially with the Do-Si-Dos, the choice is Port.