White and Pink and Where to Drink

– and Suggestions for What to Think

by Michael Parker

There is a joke that asks, “What’s Irish and comes out in the springtime?” The answer: patio furniture.

There’s another joke, an unintentional one, spoken at wine tastings. “This is a nice patio wine.” Those who say it are not joking, they are selling, but what the hell does it mean? Not to be confused with “a nice picnic wine,” this wine is not as good as it could be, or you could do better, but drink this one efficiently on your patio while you sweat and swat bugs?

I have to ask, “Many of my readers have a balcony. Do you have any balcony wines? I happen to have a deck. It’s a huge deck. What would you recommend for that? For those with small decks, do you have a bigger, racier, or more suave wine that would compensate?”

There is no doubt they are trying to encourage more frequent easy drinking because frequency means increased sales. And of course it is necessary to distinguish a casual drinker from wines made and meant to go with food. The word choice can be awkward, both recommending and downplaying the same wine, but I reserve the right to ridicule.

This sort of talk reminds me of a frequent complaint about hiring in the service industry: while job ads consistently call for applicants with “extensive wine knowledge,” the managers who place those ads are actually reluctant to hire such knowledge. Often enough, their egos are to blame, but I have noticed another factor. There is a worry that those with extensive wine knowledge are prone to talk too much.

I blame the wine reps who pour at trade shows, the very ones who give us not only such lines as “patio wine,” but also the endless blabber about soil, slope, sun, shade, season, storage, stewardship, and shipping. They have “extensive wine knowledge,” do they not? (Well, no, not all of them, but they do repeat well.)

I’ll bet good wine money that those who do the hiring have been annoyed enough by such broker/wholesaler wine talk that they do not realize there is an alternative wine knowledge – the abridged kind that sells at the retail level, custom tailored as customers are profiled at the shelf or table.

Please pardon my extensive wine knowledge as I profile my readers and suggest these pretty patio and al fresco wines:

Cavicchioli, Lambrusco ($10)Did you just say, “He has to be kidding”? Yes this is sweet red, but definitely not the bottled candy advertised in 1980s TV commercials. Cavicchioli makes it the right way, the way they did 90 years ago. Good on its own, before or after a meal, or with light snacks. Patio.

Domaine Sainte Lucie, MiP* Made in Provence, rosé 2011 ($20)Yes this is worth the money because it is one of the best rosés, ever. Made from Cinsault, Grenache, and Syrah, this wine is amazingly light, both delicate but structured, rosé but barely pink at all. It drinks like a finely crafted Sauvignon Blanc. Worth the money. Balcony, facing west.

Man O’ War, Sauvignon Blanc, Waiheke Island, North Island, New Zealand 2010 ($15-ish)Move over, Marlborough! The Waiheke Sauvingnon is downright elegant, with two interesting factors: it is 15% Semillon and has some residual sugar. This is not a grapefruity Sauvingon like so many from Marlborough. Good acidity makes it good with food, the sugar gives it body without standout sweetness, the Semillon will sustain it longer in the body. Big deck, al fresco dining.

Dama de Toro, Malvasia, Spain 2011 ($13)Clean is the first word that came to mind at first taste. Not too fruity, not too citrusy. Simple but well made. This is definitely meant to be drunk young – within its first two years. Also, like the MiP*, the color is almost not there. Patio.

Tahbilk, Viognier, Nagambie Lakes, Victoria, Austrailia 2011 ($15)For a while, Viogniers were being made with full-blown flower-power, and it got to be too much. Tahbilk’s style is milder-mannered, appetizing, and even alluring. Floral notes, touch of peach, nice texture. I like their Roussanne as well. Patio, beside lots of little flowers.

Acrobat, Rosé of Pinot Noir, Oregon 2011 ($12) This rosé is downright pretty, a lovely color of pink. Nuances include kiwi, watermelon, lychee, raspberries, and pomegranates. This is a wine for which I reserve the word viscous – round mouthfeel, long dry finish.